Like I said a couple of posts ago, the news about Max's hearing cut me to the core. I have never been so devastated. Our family was however, blessed to be living in Atlanta when Max came in to the world. This was no coincidence and had to be providence. I am by no means an expert on the subject, but I do consider myself to be somewhat educated when it comes to hearing loss and cochlear implants. Believe me when I tell you this, there is no better place in the world than Atlanta, Georgia to deal with the news that your newly born child is deaf. Our initial audiologist, Edie Gibson (now with Advanced Bionics) was an angel. Max's post implant audiologist, Jolie Fainberg is second to none. Dr. Wendell Todd, Max's surgeon, is world renown and last but by no means least his Auditory Verbal therapist, MaryAnne Costin, stands heads and tails above her peers. (side-note....I know when my mom reads this, she is going to grimace at my punctuation, but I amexperiencing severe brain cramps. Sorry Mom!!!!)
Anyway, I tell you all of that in order to begin a transition in to the miracle of Max's current life. The time leading up to Max's surgery was tense. In order for the doctor to perform a cochlear implant surgery, the patient's ears must be free from fluid. Fluid is a sign of an ear infection and an ear infection mixed with ear surgery can lead to meningitis. This was a problem, because Max always seemed to have fluid in his ears. To solve this problem, Dr. Todd decided to put tubes in to Max's ears. So when he was around nine months old, Max got tubes in his ears. This seemed to help and kept Max infection free up until the time of his cochlear implant surgery.
Let me apologize. This post just isn't flowing and I really want to do a good job with the time leading up to and the day of Max's surgery. I will pick this back up when my head is a little more clear.
Thanks.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Claire Bear Continued.....
Claire's hearing test, I remember it well. Even though it went unspoken between us, Stephanie and I were pretty nervous about Claire's test. I hadn't worried much about it throughout the pregnancy, but now that the time was finally here, it scared the crap out of me and I know that the fear had taken away a very tiny bit of joy from Claire's birth. The morning after Claire was born, the nurse came into our room and took her away for the hearing screening. We put on a brave face, but anyone that knew us well could tell what was on our mind.
A short time later, the audiologist on call came back with Claire's results. She had failed. I was numb and Stephanie was devastated. Both of us aged a couple of years in a couple of minutes. Knowing our family's background, the audiologist treated us with kid gloves. She implored us not to worry, citing the fact that Claire had fluid in her ears and that situation could easily have caused her to fail her screening. "Whatever." I thought. "I've heard that before." I knew in my heart that Claire was deaf. I wasn't devastated like I was with Max, but boy was I getting extremely tired of bad things happening to our family (and selfishly, bad things happening to me). The audiologist said that we could re-test the following day, after the fluid had time to drain from Claire's ears.
Stephanie prayed hard for a positive result. I prayed some, but I was pretty ticked at God and was beginning to think that He never listened to me anyway. The nurse came to get Claire the next day. I waited in the room for a few minutes. One of our friends came by and tried to comfort us while we were waiting for the results. I couldn't handle it and went to watch the test through the glass in the nursery. Not expecting anything positive, I was surprised to see the audiologist smile at me through the glass. She gave me the thumbs up! Claire had passed the test! I couldn't believe it. I sprinted back to the room and told Stephanie the wonderful news. Maybe all of our bad luck was behind us.
We happily took Claire home the next day. We were pretty relieved as you can imagine and we began our life with our second child. Life was pretty normal for the next few months. However, after Claire was around four or five months old, I started having doubts about her hearing. She was not babbling at all and she seemed to be a really heavy sleeper. I remember "parenting" one night when Stephanie was out with her friends. I think that Max was in bed and that Claire was asleep on the couch down stairs. The thought of Claire getting a false positive on her test was really starting to get to me, so I decided to conduct my own test. I turned my cell phone volume all the way up and placed the phone next to Claire's ear. It was a pretty pathetic sight. Anyway, I set off the ringer. Claire didn't budge. My fears began to grow, but I was not yet convinced. Stephanie and I would clap around Claire sometimes in order to get her attention. She seemed to respond to the claps most of the time. My fears were cemented when Claire was around ten months old. She was taking a nap in her crib upstairs when the smoke alarms went crazy and started to blear throughout the house. Claire didn't move a muscle. I knew she was deaf. Stephanie was not convinced. She recounted many stories to me about small children sleeping through smoke alarms. Evidently, it was some sort of phenomena.
We went through the next few months worrying and decided to have a conclusive test shortly after Christmas. We had to know the truth. At least the truth would help us move on and get some direction. We took Claire to the audiologist's office at Vanderbilt. She hooked Claire up to the machine and the test began. I could tell that it was not going well. With tears in her eyes, she gave us the bad news. Claire was deaf.
Like I said before, I promise that our story gets happier, so please hang in there. I'm really tired, so I'll try to pick this back up soon.
A short time later, the audiologist on call came back with Claire's results. She had failed. I was numb and Stephanie was devastated. Both of us aged a couple of years in a couple of minutes. Knowing our family's background, the audiologist treated us with kid gloves. She implored us not to worry, citing the fact that Claire had fluid in her ears and that situation could easily have caused her to fail her screening. "Whatever." I thought. "I've heard that before." I knew in my heart that Claire was deaf. I wasn't devastated like I was with Max, but boy was I getting extremely tired of bad things happening to our family (and selfishly, bad things happening to me). The audiologist said that we could re-test the following day, after the fluid had time to drain from Claire's ears.
Stephanie prayed hard for a positive result. I prayed some, but I was pretty ticked at God and was beginning to think that He never listened to me anyway. The nurse came to get Claire the next day. I waited in the room for a few minutes. One of our friends came by and tried to comfort us while we were waiting for the results. I couldn't handle it and went to watch the test through the glass in the nursery. Not expecting anything positive, I was surprised to see the audiologist smile at me through the glass. She gave me the thumbs up! Claire had passed the test! I couldn't believe it. I sprinted back to the room and told Stephanie the wonderful news. Maybe all of our bad luck was behind us.
We happily took Claire home the next day. We were pretty relieved as you can imagine and we began our life with our second child. Life was pretty normal for the next few months. However, after Claire was around four or five months old, I started having doubts about her hearing. She was not babbling at all and she seemed to be a really heavy sleeper. I remember "parenting" one night when Stephanie was out with her friends. I think that Max was in bed and that Claire was asleep on the couch down stairs. The thought of Claire getting a false positive on her test was really starting to get to me, so I decided to conduct my own test. I turned my cell phone volume all the way up and placed the phone next to Claire's ear. It was a pretty pathetic sight. Anyway, I set off the ringer. Claire didn't budge. My fears began to grow, but I was not yet convinced. Stephanie and I would clap around Claire sometimes in order to get her attention. She seemed to respond to the claps most of the time. My fears were cemented when Claire was around ten months old. She was taking a nap in her crib upstairs when the smoke alarms went crazy and started to blear throughout the house. Claire didn't move a muscle. I knew she was deaf. Stephanie was not convinced. She recounted many stories to me about small children sleeping through smoke alarms. Evidently, it was some sort of phenomena.
We went through the next few months worrying and decided to have a conclusive test shortly after Christmas. We had to know the truth. At least the truth would help us move on and get some direction. We took Claire to the audiologist's office at Vanderbilt. She hooked Claire up to the machine and the test began. I could tell that it was not going well. With tears in her eyes, she gave us the bad news. Claire was deaf.
Like I said before, I promise that our story gets happier, so please hang in there. I'm really tired, so I'll try to pick this back up soon.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Claire Bear
I'm kind of tired tonight, so I don't know how long or coherent this post will be. Here it goes anyway.
Claire Bear. Where do I begin? Claire Diane Hawkins is the apple of my eye. I know that most dads love their little girls, but I doubt that any dad could love their baby girl as much as I love mine! Just my opinion.
After Stephanie and I had Max, we were a little scared to have another child. We cherished Max of course, but we weren't sure if we wanted to take a chance on bringing another child with a disability in to the world. Before making the decision to have another baby, Stephanie and I decided to get some genetic testing done. We figured that if the geneticist found a recessive gene, we would not have another baby and just enjoy Max. We were living in Chattanooga at the time and were told that there was a great geneticist at Erlanger. The appointment was made, the tests were taken (ouch) and the results came in. No recessive gene was found. The geneticist told us however, that we still had an 8% chance of having another child with a hearing loss similar to Max's. We figured we could handle these odds and decided to go for it! Surely the odds would be with us and a second child would not have a hearing loss. Surely Max's hearing loss was caused by a stomach bug that Stephanie had during her first trimester.
Well, Stephanie became pregnant again during the summer of 2005 , much to my surprise. (just kidding) What a summer. We were in the process of moving back to Nashville and I was in the process of switching jobs. Have I told you guys that I am never satisfied? We somehow sold our house in Chattanooga and bought a new house in Brentwood. The move went fairly smoothly and our family was back in Nashville. This was something we had longed for over several years. We were happy, Stephanie was very pregnant and life was good.
Fast forward. Claire was born on January 10th, 2006 at Baptisit Hospital. The delivery went well, Stephanie and the baby were healthy and everything seemed well. Only one scary item loomed over the horizon, Claire's hearing test.
OK. I don't want to leave anyone "hangin'" as the kids say these days, but I am tired and I want to do a good job with this next part. I'll try to finish tomorrow night. Sorry.
God bless....
Claire Bear. Where do I begin? Claire Diane Hawkins is the apple of my eye. I know that most dads love their little girls, but I doubt that any dad could love their baby girl as much as I love mine! Just my opinion.
After Stephanie and I had Max, we were a little scared to have another child. We cherished Max of course, but we weren't sure if we wanted to take a chance on bringing another child with a disability in to the world. Before making the decision to have another baby, Stephanie and I decided to get some genetic testing done. We figured that if the geneticist found a recessive gene, we would not have another baby and just enjoy Max. We were living in Chattanooga at the time and were told that there was a great geneticist at Erlanger. The appointment was made, the tests were taken (ouch) and the results came in. No recessive gene was found. The geneticist told us however, that we still had an 8% chance of having another child with a hearing loss similar to Max's. We figured we could handle these odds and decided to go for it! Surely the odds would be with us and a second child would not have a hearing loss. Surely Max's hearing loss was caused by a stomach bug that Stephanie had during her first trimester.
Well, Stephanie became pregnant again during the summer of 2005 , much to my surprise. (just kidding) What a summer. We were in the process of moving back to Nashville and I was in the process of switching jobs. Have I told you guys that I am never satisfied? We somehow sold our house in Chattanooga and bought a new house in Brentwood. The move went fairly smoothly and our family was back in Nashville. This was something we had longed for over several years. We were happy, Stephanie was very pregnant and life was good.
Fast forward. Claire was born on January 10th, 2006 at Baptisit Hospital. The delivery went well, Stephanie and the baby were healthy and everything seemed well. Only one scary item loomed over the horizon, Claire's hearing test.
OK. I don't want to leave anyone "hangin'" as the kids say these days, but I am tired and I want to do a good job with this next part. I'll try to finish tomorrow night. Sorry.
God bless....
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